Too far is always far enough

I probably went too far, which is of course my nature. I know I know you told me so. You were right. I was wrong but this of course is nothing new. I am always wrong and I don’t just mean about you. I mean about the way I thought I could drink that case of Guinness by myself and I nearly did before I puked in your hamper, I mean about the way I thought golf clubs for me would make a nice Christmas present for you, I mean about the way I thought I’d surprise you and came home early only to find you in bed watching Fox News (You know now it will never be the same). If you look you will find me at night sitting on my deck smoking a cigar, drinking a beer and writing these words on my laptop. Sure, you can come over but hide behind the shrubbery where I throw my cigar butts. If I toss one and you catch it be sure to wish on it and throw it back. I’ll then send the Chihuahuas out to bite your ankles because unfortunately I’m all out of dreams. I only have cigar butts now.