I am going to propose something that might seem outlandish at first but bear with me. What I propose is that if you are indeed mentally unhinged that you act that way all the time. Don’t put on an act and pretend you are a happy and fun person. Don’t smile and act shy. Eventually your true self will show through anyway so just be a raging lunatic all the time. Let your google eyes pop out! Hell, I will high five you as you run by me in the mall with your pants down around your ankles.

You see if you follow this plan then the rest of us don’t have to get to know you and find you keep a collection of rotting chicken bones under your bed or that you build replica model cars out of hair you find when you stalk people. We don’t have to be conned by your awe shucks bullshit only to find out that you have more mental problems than Charles Manson. This way all the people that are real and somewhat normal can reside on one side of town and all the fake crazies can reside on the other. We never have to cross paths again! Think about it. You can be with all your crazy friends and just let loose all the time. What a beautiful world it would be.