Big Guy Coming Through

I have a problem with guys whose claim to fame in life is that they’re “big”. They are usually blobs and talk about football games of days yore. They have names like Big John and Big Mike and Big Jim. If a fight breaks out the big guy’s friends call on him. Of course no one ever fights Big Mike because, well, that would just be plain stupid. He is after all BIG and everyone knows that BIGGER is the best. Or is it? Is it possible that we have watched one too many Godzilla movies where the giant lizard crushes fleeing Japanese villagers and believe that these BIG individuals are equal in destructive power? Further scientific research will either confirm or deny this assertion and really the result is of little relevance because BIG is BIG and that means…what the hell does that mean exactly?

One of the other trainers at the gym pushed me too far. He stole a client from me off the consultation sheet. You see, the consultation sheet is a place where potential clients sign up to meet with personal trainers. Yesterday I called a client who I had gotten off the list. When you take a client off the list you write your name next to his or her name so everyone knows that this potential client is yours. Well, when I called this potential client she told me she had been pulled aside by another trainer and the she was training with him.

What happened is this little cocksucker read this woman’s name on the consultation sheet, with my name next to it. He then waited for her to come into the gym and solicited her before I called her.

This morning when I went into the gym to do my cardio this other trainer was there. I laid into him. I am not good at confrontation but this needed to be done. He has been stealing clients and taking all the consultations for months and months. There is another trainer that is one other scumbag weasel who does the same thing. Who the fuck do these people think they are? They are just lowlifes in my opinion.

All I want is a fair distribution of clients from the consultation list. I am a good trainer and I will do fine given an opportunity. These guys don’t want to give equal distribution because they suck as trainers and they know they won’t get any business. People complain to me all the time about how bad they are. Management needs to step in and get rid of them…

Did you get a cigar? You didn’t? Well then which would you like “It’s a boy” or It’s a girl”? Yes, I am a father. That’s right and depending on your sex you may be a mother or a father too. This occurred to me this morning as I ate my breakfast and watched an interview with that freak of a woman with the giant fake lips that had octuplets after being implanted with fertilized eggs. She was clearly not mentally stable and you probably already know she is single, doesn’t have a job, and already had six children.

So, guess what? You—the tax payer—will get to support her children and all the health problems that going along with multiple births through in vitro fertilization. I think the doctor that doctor that impregnated this lunatic should be responsible for the millions of dollars its going to cost to raise these kids.

The Steelers Win!

This has been a very good sports year for me. I am a Phillies fan and a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. It's not very often your favorite teams win championships in one year. It happened once before but who knows it may never happen again...