Some goddamn Nancy tried to sell me a bundle of flowers while I was waiting for my contact on the corner of Market and Second yesterday afternoon. He was wearing a suit that looked like it was made of burlap and he had a smile on his face that was centered around teeth so white they hurt my eyes to look directly at them.
He stuffed flowers in my face. “There not petunias and you will go to hell for treating me like this. The profits from these flowers all go to God.”
I grabbed the flowers and crushed them in my hand. “I’m already in hell and besides God told me they use Tootsie Pops as currency in heaven. Now scram before I replant those flowers somewhere on your body.”
He stepped in my face and I dropped him cold. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not religiously intolerant. I just don’t give a good goddamn about your god so don’t try to force him on me or we’re going to have problems.
4 comments:
i'm sure whichever god wouldn't appreciate assholes like that representing him. unless it's the god of money.
the god of science would kick that dude's ass.
i always did have a little something for burma.
Ludlow is the man.
yo, where are you?!
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