The little man/ big car complex is not a new phenomena but I feel I need to mention it since I was almost run off the road last night by a 15 foot high Toyota truck driven by what can only be described as a Hobbit. The origins of this complex can be traced as far back as the Stone Age with the discovery of the Blue Caves of Mongolia where a tiny stick figure caveman is depicted puffing out his chest next to a giant wheel. This doesn’t say much for our evolution but it does speak volumes about our primitive inclination to compensate for our inadequacies by directing attention away from them by creating oversized forms of personal transportation.
A good rule of thumb for a shorter guy looking to buy a car is not to buy any vehicle with wheels that come up to your neck. Sure, if you buy the monster truck you’ll look big as you tool down the highway running over pint sized compact and hybrid cars but when you get out everyone will be disappointed, especially the women. It’s the equivalent of stuffing a suck in your underwear or toilet tissue in your bra. I’ve seen several vertically challenged men use rope ladders to climb in and out of their Hummers and it’s just down right degrading. My modest proposal would be to invest in a pair of boots with enormous heels and tease your hair (if you have any) into a very high afro if you need to feel big. Sixty inch tires and a lift kit aren’t going to elevate your social status or your height so stick with a Mini or fuel efficient Hybrid Insight, then you can brag to environmentally conscious chicks that you care about the earth’s atmosphere. You have a better chance of getting somewhere with this angle than driving a vehicle that gets snagged in power lines.
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